The ban has been lifted
“The reason you were able to be indifferent is because you don’t have longing.”
He said conclusively. Chaser, who used a suggestive tone, never stopped trying to charm me, befitting his abilities. But at this moment, there was nowhere in his voice that seemed to deceive me. I could understand it better because I knew him, so I blankly pondered his words.
What did he just say now?
“I had it.”
Slowly my mind returns. No words came out. It was just absurd. Memory of the previous world? Of course I had that too. What was he trying to deceive now?
“You look confident that you remember. So, Iana, can I ask you a question? What was your name in the previous world?”
“That’s…….”
My well-opened lips couldn’t move anymore.
“Age?”
“…….”
Chaser looked at my frozen face with neither joy nor sorrow. I just looked at him as he smiled softly As if doing his job.
“I’ll give it back now.”
At that moment, Chaser’s hand covered my eyes.
“It was supposed to be yours.”
I couldn’t even move my body, even though I didn’t feel any strength. It was because something ran through my mind. In the dark, for some reason, the moment I first met Chaser pa.s.sed.
The moment when he appeared as ‘Brother’ in Kambrakam and talked with my eyes closed. Then, he asked me if I had forgiven him. Of course, that is what he said to ‘Iana’, but……Why do I think now that those words were also spoken to me?
I staggered back. Chaser’s other hand grabbed my wrist and supported me so I wouldn’t fall.
“Huu…….”
My stomach churned. I felt a cold sweat and the pain like my intestines were being squeezed. My vision looked odd. The s.p.a.ce turned upside down, the ground was like it was jelly, the sky was falling, and the pain that felt like nausea attacked me so badly.
I wanted to sit down with the sensation of the soles of my feet falling off, but I clenched my teeth and endured it. I couldn’t even remember how I had to endure so much for such a short time.
Chaser slowly removed his hand.
“Come to think about it, Iana. In the end, if I can’t have you.”
A gentle and ecstatic voice pierced my ears like arrows.
“I thought it would be okay if I sent you back to where you were.”
I understood the meaning of those words, but my feelings did not flow properly. It felt like a lot of things were pouring out into my head at random.
Ah, why did I forget?
Chaser wiped the sweat dripping down my chin. His expression was not visible in my blurry vision.
Why did I forget this?
Chaser took a step back. And one more step.
“Sister? Sister!”
At the moment when I felt like I was caught in Chaser’s shadow, a welcome voice came from behind. It was Francia’s voice like a ray of salvation.
But I’m really sorry for her… I don’t feel salvation from that voice now. I wasn’t happy. Something was about to overflow from me.
Looking back at the place where Chaser was, Chaser was nowhere to be found. It didn’t even feel like he was there from the beginning. Like he was completely hidden.
“Sister, what happened? Me and the Yellow Rose somehow took control over here, but when the Empress appeared……. Sister?”
Tears flowed down my cheeks the moment I saw Francia.
“Sister!”
I couldn’t see Francia. I just murmured, looking at the spot where Chaser had disappeared. Chaser, Chaser, Chaser! My emotions, which had never been intense, finally exploded like a runaway train. Laughter flowed along with crying. My head creaks like it’s broken. All I can think of is the man’s smiling face.
“…… you’re really……. trash.”
I knew how urgent this moment was, and what I had to do was to fight the moment. I have to move, I have to move……. ha, haha. A smirk mixed with disappointment leaked out.
“Why, it had… to be now…….”
Still, I had to say this.
“…… go …… me.”
“Sister? Sister! Sorry. I can’t hear you well. Are you hurt? Huh? In pain?”
Francia’s voice was sobbing. If it was the usual, I would just calmly ask why she was crying, it’s nothing. I would have patted her.
But I couldn’t.
My breathing became short. It felt like my throat was narrowing. Suddenly, boiling waves. .h.i.t my chest, with nowhere to overflow anymore.
I couldn’t even hold my chest. I grabbed Francia’s shoulder and collapsed.
“Huuh……. huff……. I…….”
My indifference and nonchalance were shattered by the longing and memories that I have been suppressing for 5 years. Everything was useless to stop it.
“Want to go home…….”
Ironically, I was such a very happy person in the previous world.
Very much.
***
“Sister. Are you okay?”
Francia was busy staring at my face over and over again. She seemed to be conscious of me. The way she rolls her eyes, pretending to tuck her hair behind her ears or tidying up her clothes, reminded me of the little girl in Domulit mansion long ago.
If it had been the usual, I would have smiled brightly, but I struggled and forced my lips up. I smiled so I didn’t have to reveal my messiness on the outside.
“Yes. I’m okay.”
I gave no explanation or reason. Francia doesn’t ask me anything either. On the contrary, she seemed to have guessed something about it.
“Black Rose, that bast, no, that guy. What did he do? It’s him again, right?”
Instead of telling her why I was in tears, I had to tell her what had happened over the past three days. Even the fact that I moved here with Ricdorian and Chaser.
“That man really.”
Francia bit her thumb tightly with her teeth. It was her habit when she was troubled or anxious.
“I knew things were going to be weird. d.a.m.n b.a.s.t.a.r.d. We already have the Empress as an enemy now, he even showed up here.”
It seems that Francia was trying her best to speak politely in front of me, but she got agitated and failed.
I also received brief information about the situation here from Francia. Originally, Francia and Lenag decided to meet in Kambrakam by using different paths. And they succeeded in meeting safely, but not long after, the Empress led the knights and broke into this place. She said that the Empress at that time really looked like a madman.
The two people, who had already heard the Empress’s declaration of partic.i.p.ation at the beginning of the Rose Festival, thought it was suspicious when the Empress said, ‘I came here at the Blue Rose’s request,’. They thought I wouldn’t have said that.
The two of them pretended to be guarding this place according to the Empress’s orders and focused on secretly grasping the surveillance system, and in the meantime, I appeared and now we’re here.
“The Empress said the Black Rose would come running here to harm Sister. So we have to protect you together. He is the common enemy.”
There was no respect for the Empress in Francia’s eyes that had sunk coldly.
“It’s not even funny. She is the enemy too.”
Fortunately, no one was on our way. It was thanks to Francia who threaded a deserted path.
She says it’s been a long time since the central n.o.ble prisoners were moved to another ward. It seems that the Empress also knew about the cave beneath Kambrakam.
‘There’s no way she won’t know.’
I listened to Francia and kept myself together. I rubbed my face several times in order not to be shaken. Of course, this did not mean that I was not agitated. My heart was still pounding restlessly.
I closed my eyes tightly.
There were many stories like this from where I was. A story about dying and coming back to life. A story of reincarnation in another world.
One day they woke up and found themselves in the book they were reading.
The main character who became Alice in Wonderland adapted to the world without difficulty. Sometimes they were orphans, sometimes they died in car accidents, sometimes they died of illness. It was as if the author had taken consideration so the main character won’t have any regrets.
Then what about me?
Sadly, I lived happily, then suddenly became a possessor, and forgot my longing for five years.
The main character, who could not give up the longing, was engulfed in it. Like Dorothy, not Alice who ventured into Wonderland, she longed for her warm home.
Now, as Dorothy, I was hesitant to click my shoes.
The moment I regained my memories, it was heartbreaking to have my entire life taken away. I couldn’t see anything anymore.
But now?
“Sister?”
Francia stopped walking. I no longer walked, I paused, and tilted my head strangely.
If I decide to go back, there are my roses who will follow me blindly. My Roses.
Anxiety flashed through Francia’s pretty face. I smiled showing I was okay.
“Ricdorian must have moved somewhere here. We must find him.”
“If it was the Grand Duke, there would be no problem. What’s wrong?”
“…… Ricdorian’s physical condition is strange. He has boiling fever.”
Now was not the time to be buried in the tsunami created by memories. I forcibly pressed it down and hardened myself.
“Fever? That can’t be true.”
Francia frowned as she tilted her head at an angle and frowned.
“That person has a body that will not budge with an ordinary illness. No matter how seriously injured he gets, he will recover quickly.”
Francia’s voice explaining about Ricdorian was refreshing. Although she hated him, it seemed that she had faith in him.
“That.”
I hesitated to respond to that. Come to think of it, …… Pudding was going to say something to me. Apparently it called me right before we moved.
‘Pudding.’
I called Pudding for a moment, but there was no answer.
Francia led me to join Lenag for now. Perhaps she realized the seriousness on my face, her steps were faster than before.
As I was walking for a while, I suddenly heard a small whimper inside.
-…… Human…….
It was Pudding. Without stopping, I quickly answered.
‘What’s going on, what were you trying to say? Why the small voice? Are you still recovering?’
There was a lot that I wanted to say. For some reason, it was because of the unexplained anxiety. Whenever I feel like this, bad things happen……. Thump thump. My heart was beating out of sync.
-Human, I think you should know…… Nyan.
‘Know what.’
-The ban has been lifted. He’s dying, Nyan.
It was strange. Pudding’s voice was too weak for a guardian deity who was recovering.
-It’s so critical that it can’t improve…….
‘What?’
I asked, even though I seemed to know. Without even needing to ask, my body seemed to tremble. Responding to my nervous heart, the answer flowed out.
-The Red Rose’s lifespan is short, Nyan.
This time, I had to stop. I couldn’t even hear Francia’s voice calling me.
‘When?’
Eventually, after a moment of silence, the heavy sound of the young guardian deity resonated deeply in my chest.
-…… It’s today, Nyan.